so it begins

well, i decided to create a blog.

this is suprising, as i've looked at blogs--and bloggers--with great disdain for quite a long time, at least in most cases. i've just never understood why one would choose to write his or her most personal affairs, usually along with other people's most personal affairs, and then make it accessible to internet users worldwide. then, of course, said blogger becomes shocked and offended when a friend/significant other/someone who hated you to begin with but just reads the blog for purposes of mockery becomes disgruntled when their private lives are made public by ol' lame blog mcghee. not awesome. i imagine one with a blog as such is only seeking attention.

needless to say, this blog will not be one of that nature.

however, i do fully and greedily admit that i seek attention. my dream would be for all of you to read my literary ditties and shower me with praise of my wit, sarcasm, irony, and poignance in writing, thus encouraging me to submit my entries for publication. i also desire your hearty concurrence with me regarding my hatred for jorts, braided leather belts and short-sleeved men's dress shirts, to name a few. i hope to enlighten you with my intuitive synopses of religious, political, and moral issues, as well as whatever else about which i may choose to assert an opinion. simply put, i plan to successfully promote all things me. all of my -isms, if you will. hence: ballyhoo.

ballyhoo, for those who don't share my passion for ridiculous, obscured words, is pretty much blatant advertising or promotion--usually with great noisiness. or, as a verb, it would be to noisily (or perhaps even obnoxiously) promote something. so here i am, ballyhooing.

now, chances are that those of you reading this masterpiece will not find me funny, intuitive, or intelligent. in fact, this blog will probably become that which i mentioned above: one that you read not because you think its cool, but more for the purposes of mockery. and i'm ok with that. i'm sure i will try way too hard to make it sound cool and wordy, and you might find me mean and judgmental. you can tell me that. it will be duly noted.

truth be told, though, while i hope you do find this blog hip and funny and that you like my ideas, i admit that i am doing this primarily as a way to practice my own writing skills, and welcome comments. but don't be a jerkneck, k? i will go ahead and give the disclaimer that it's not my intent to offend anyone, but let's face it: if i (or anyone, for that matter) actually tried not to do so, i would just sit there and grin stupidly and never express an opinion about anything, whether it be same sex marriage or neckties with wolves printed all over them.

so if you want to respond to a post, go for it... but don't be all redneck and hateful about it. responses for the sake of intelligent, mind expanding conversation only, please. while i am out to ballyhoo, i would also very much like to hear what you have to say.

ok, tally ho! (not to be confused with ballyhoo... but that, too...)